Learn your lessons well, Part Three

My plan was to post 10 lessons a week for one month – easy enough, and that would give me 40 by my birthday. Except…I suck and “every week” turned into “whenever” because deadlines just aren’t my thing. Here is 21-30; you can read the first 10 here and the second 10 here if you missed them.

Christmas is no fun without kids. This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. When you are a child, and later when you have children, the holiday season is full of fun and fairy lights and gathering around the tree on Christmas morning to unwrap gifts and be together. Christmas as an adult (especially if you are single and childless) is quite different. It involves not knowing what to buy anyone, spending too much money that you may or may not even have, being forced to be social and pretending to be jolly, and just too much stress in general. Every year I hope it will be different; every year it is the same.

“Nobody likes their job, nobody got enough sleep…so just suck up and be nice.” – And Difranco, Pixie People are so crabby all the time (yours truly included way too often), and really, why? It’s a rarity to find someone who is 100% happy with their life. Why don’t we commiserate together instead of taking it out on each other? (Side note: this completely contradicts the fact that I am a total bitch in many of my other lessons, I realize this. I never said I followed all of the rules!)

Adopt, don’t shop. Come on people, this shouldn’t even need to be said! There are a gazillion cats, dogs, bunnies, turtles, etc in the pound; there is zero reason to buy from a breeder or pet store! You are not “saving a life” by buying an animal—it is simple supply and demand and you are part of the problem. If you want a specific breed, do the research; I can guarantee there is a fuzzy friend with your specific needs out there that is adoptable. Remember, just because an animal is in a shelter doesn’t mean they are damaged—it means they were let down by humans. Also, don’t be a douche—spay or neuter your pet!

Random acts of silence should be quiet. I catch a lot of shit on this one whenever I say it, but I fully believe it. The entire point of this is to help others, not to have people praise you for being such a good person. Don’t boast about the donation you made or the time you spent—just do it and know you did good and move on.

Guilt is the most powerful emotion. We all do things we don’t want to do for numerous reasons, but I think one of the biggest motivators out there is guilt. Believe me, I fall for it time and again so I am not judging. But take a minute and really think about it—how many things would you not do, or would you do for that matter, if it weren’t for that horrible, nagging feeling in your gut?

Dunkin Donuts trains their workers to mess up orders. I mean, they must. There is no other explanation for the number of mistakes that happen on my (too many) trips into that store.

Ten is a really large number. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph this list is taking forever to write!

Nothing is truly lost unless your mom can’t find it. I swear, I could look for something for three months and not find it, and my mother will look for two and a half minutes and find it. I’m not sure what happens when you become a mom, but it’s magical!

Life is short—eat dessert first. In other words, sometimes you just gotta say fuck it and do what makes you happy!

Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we don’t know the reason, and that sucks. But trusting that there are no mistakes will help you get through. Here’s an example: If I never married an alcoholic, I’d never have graduated and gone on to grad school. Hear me out. I was miserable in my marriage, and often wondered why the hell I married the man I did. We went to couples’ counseling and, spoiler alert, the husband is gone, the therapist is still around. And if it wasn’t for this therapist helping me through heaps of difficulties, I would have never had the courage to go back to school. So see, even a shitty marriage can lead to something good if you trust the universe.


My birthday is on Monday, and between reading, getting ready for my presentation, and actual class I doubt I will get the last ten up before then. But who knows, time will tell. Until then, please comment and share this post! The more times you share, the more people will read, and the more cookies I will eventually have to buy for everyone to celebrate.



One Comment

  1. How about “Don’t set yourself up for failure by setting goals you know you most likely will not meet”? Now, only nine more to go.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *